Awwww, Robyne! That's a lot of OUCH in May! It sure does hold a lot of painful reminders, and of course a couple of those losses are still pretty fresh.

Definitely overwhelming - I can appreciate that. It's good that you're trying to pour a lot of this into your writing - and YES you will make it through, and YES, for now it sucks and it's challenging.

I wonder if there's something you can do in May that might be a sort of 'multi-honouring' of these people? Something that's meant to also remember the good, the funny, the light, the happiness of being with those people? Maybe set aside time, make it a special occasion even if just for yourself, gather their photos, some bits of things that might spark funny or happy memories, light a candle for all of them and recall the good times??

If nothing else, it might just help you to feel a little more balanced about the losses. It's okay to feel sad and acknowledge the loss. And it's also okay to feel happy to acknowledge the good. With both, you find balance and it's easier to get through the parts that hurt.

Thinking of you, my friend, sending lots of love and my best hugs - and some cinnamon tea and chocolate chip cookies! 🍪🫖