And No One Stopped Them | Part 20
How To Trash Your Life When You’re Just 15
Blinded by guilt, choking on obligation, I didn’t know how to speak up
Arriving home from school one January day to find yet another big, fat letter from Richard under the letter box, I sighed heavily as I bent to pick it up off the floor, almost requiring a forklift due to its oppressive contents. Oh, fuck! More of the same old boring, tedious, lovesick shit.
I tossed the unopened letter on my bed. I’d get to it later. That reminded me, I was overdue to write to him, too. Again.
Yawn.
Until that moment, I’d been having so much fun with my three friends — and especially Charlie — I hadn’t really noticed the change in my feelings. Fuck. I guess I’m gonna have to deal with this sometime soon.
I thought I’d still been saying all the right IloveyouImiss you crap in my letters because that was how I felt. Or at least, it was how I wanted to feel. But although I was unaware of it, my letters spoke volumes for me. It hadn’t occurred to me that they were more honest with Richard than I’d been with myself. He was not a happy man.
And he was about to do something that would change my life forever.
