In most cases, yes. But in this case, my fragile emotional state was due to everything else first, the awfulness of several incidents in the UK that led to the diagnosis of Complex PTSD in 2021, leaving UK July ‘22 to care for Peter John, his sudden death shortly after, getting to George’s basement in Calgary and feeling she’ll-shocked. And weeks later this injury and the trauma around that, feeling vulnerable and trapped in that basement especially while he was in Scotland.

So I was already pretty fragile, to say the least, and not in any position to make judgements.

If it hadn’t been for all of that background and I was just dealing with the injury, Vicky’s “fake lurches” would have been seen in a whole other light.

At the time, I just saw it as childish and immature. And as I’d told her to STOP each of the first few times I kept thinking she would. So I was actually quite proud of myself for finally getting angry that one time, given the state I was in. She finally stopped.

It’s difficult to explain the emotional state I was in during those first few months. Paralyzed by fear. Seriously deer in the headlights. Imagine a cartoon of someone in abject terror with eyes bugged out and staring. That’s how I felt.

I couldn’t have made a rational decision to save my life.

Yay, I’m HERE now! And happy, peaceful, and content!! 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻💜💜💜