Wow, Lauren, what a story! I can well imagine how confusing it's been to have your beliefs challenged.

I'm so glad you "came back" - and how wonderful that the doctor remembered you, thought about you, and took the time to get that book for you. Such a kind man!

I can relate to your story, in a way. I was 16 when I dreamed that my two best friends (sisters) were dead. I woke up with a horrible feeling I couldn't shake, told my parents as soon as I saw them in the kitchen and then my dad went to the living room, returned a moment later, and put a newspaper article in front of me. The girls were dead - car accident with their family. My parents were going to tell me - but I told them first.

This was way before there was any sort of information about this stuff available. No TV shows or psychic fairs etc. It was enough of a shock that they were dead - or that teenagers die. But that I knew about it was completely disturbing.

I didn't know what to do with that. (which is a whole other story). It was terrifying. Gradually, I came to believe that this was a gift I was meant to share. Over the years, my abilities developed to the point where I was doing professional readings, then connected audience members with loved ones in spirit, and also did monthly "psychic phone-ins" on BBC. I saw how much comfort people got from those connections. But I could never have imagined any of that in those first years when I had no idea about this sort of thing.

The point is just to say, I understand how it feels to have some massively powerful spiritual experience that blows the doors off your world and you're left standing there asking, "Now what? What do I do with THIS?"

I don't have any answers for you, other than to say time will help. Sitting in prayer or meditation can help, answers can come as we're ready to receive them.

Thank you for sharing your story. 💜